Sounds to me like a visit from the One I know as the Spirit.

I told you about the vision I had of you coming to the Void and me throwing you into the abyss of bottomless empty space. 

After I had that vision, which was some time ago, I asked her about you.  She said that since I had thrown you into the abyss, *Hes mine now.  I can do anything I want with him.*

It appears she has introduced herself to you.

After meeting the Spirit in the Void, I came to learn of her loneliness.  The infinite and eternal sorrow of being the only One. 

I have felt that pain many times, as have others whom I know.  Its like getting hit in the stomach with a wrecking ball, and then swept away into an eternity and infinity of darkness.  It makes me cry when I feel that, or even remember it, and thats not easy to do.  usually if I dont like what Im thinking or feeling, I just stop thinking or feeling.

I have my own place in the Void where I go in meditation to be with the Spirit.  I tend to think it is my own plane of existence that she has given to me.  Whatever or wherever it is, the Spirit says that she and I will be there together forever, and neither of us will ever be alone again.  Thats all I need.  Thats where I go in meditation, and thats where I will go when I die.  She says, *You have my word on it*, and thats enough for me.

What is or isnt between the rest of you and the Spirit is not my business.  She doesnt need any defense from me, she can be anything imaginable. 

Free will, buddha nature.  Its like she creates people and things, winds them up and sets them loose.  Then, whatever they may encounter, they respond with free will according to their buddha nature.  These natural responses determine if they are good or evil, and what comes to them according to their karma.

After my mom died, I asked the Spirit what was to become of her.  She said, *Im going to turn her into a troll.*  Later I asked, *Are you really going to turn my mom into a troll*, and she said, *I already did.*  I asked if that was what would happen to my brother too, and she said, *He wont be that lucky.*  So who knows, in some plane of existence far far away, I hear my mom is living under a bridge gnawing on bones. 

PS, Shayne, dont worry about the government injecting you with monitors.  The intelligence community is something really apart from the government, and is dedicated to Peace on Earth, in sum.  Most government officials dont have a high enough clearance to know what is really going on.

A guy I worked for in the Pentagon later became Dir of Naval Intelligence, Dir of NSA, and ultimately Deputy Dir of CIA.  If he said he wanted to inject me with a monitor, Id say, *Sure, go ahead.  I have nothing to hide.*  One of my duties in the Pentagon was to serve as Asst Top Secret Control Officer for our office.  I felt very complimented that no agents from other countries approached me to sell information.

I worked with a lot of other Intel types in Washington too.  There may be a rogue agent here or there, but they are the best as far as I have known, morally and ethically.  And they kill those rogue agents when they find them out.  When I worked as a Detailer (Personnel Mgr) in the Navy, about 1/3 of the people I assigned to work with other countries Navies were intel types.  The rest were mostly for technical exchange. 

Besides, even if someone injects you with a monitor without you knowing about it, it really doesnt matter, now does it ?

Quote: "i had another DREAM of moogly woogly again. haha.

it was a little mean of me to call her alien. shes just multifaceted. i dont know her point of origion. kinda spreading her love everywhere. but i got probing....and found out she can appear to anyone as anything she wants. be it a devil or satan or goddess or whatever. depending on your outlook on life. anyway i discovered to my own disamay im actually her boyfriend. haha. we been for a long long time. since we came here. shes such my little juliet. but anyway...this dream continues....she knows i like mysteries but i got her. i found her out. but alas shes like super upper duper powerful and cant keep track of all the info she gets and people been abusing her. well through her. so i suggested to her lets just be normal. give up your power and me and you togther again. like before. but yeah we found out we been battling each other and like we are sorry it involved humanity. i hate our fights. i really do. but anyway...haha. anyway she dont wanna be alone and neither do i. but we are NOT sharing our love. so humanity...either like love yourselves or kill yourselves off. sorry don and sit eh. shes MY girl. and shes coming back with a bubble butt. all for me. haha.  yeah you reincarnate....goofs. we always debated reality before but in the end we always said ..fudge it. just things got out of hand this time. opps. our bad. shesh. we be sorry. "
.........

It was difficult after getting together with her in the Void, some 20+ years ago, facing the reality that I could not have her all to myself.  She is being everything and everyone, afterall.  She has more than enough love to go around.  I'm not jealous anymore.

What she is to me she is to me, and what she is to you she is to you, as well as everyone and everything else too.  And what you say about her being anything to anyone is true too.  She has said to me many times, *I can be anyone for you.*

I have my own place in the Void to be with her, *for an eternity*.  I wondered why she said *an eternity* rather than all eternity.  It is the eternity of my own place.  In a manner of speaking, since time itself is a creation, every plane of existence has an eternity of its own, if time is created there at all. 

Im there for her, and she is there for me, because underneath it all we are the same One, *the real relation, the underlying theme*.  I remember being the One, and I remember being in the Void, as myself, with the One.  At the core, we are all the same One.

Dont forget its all illusion, or you will be subject to delusion.

Quote: "AKA: who am I to you?"
.........

The same One as everyone else, being who You decided to be as you.

One actor, many parts to play.  Also writer, director, and producer too.

Quote: "don....yooooo......we all got our own individuality.....yoooo....each our own mind man.

give it up.

haha.

done or are you gonna blabber on?

smart....but just not quite getting what im saying.

shes my girl....my girl....your talking about my girl.

my girl.

haha.

ok you go and entertain yourself with what i said.

sleepy time here.

byeeeeeeeeeeeee/

haha.
"
.........

You can be as nuts as you want to be, Shayne. 

The bottom line remains the same.

We all have our own relationship with the One, because we all are the same One.

Or as Mother Teresa put it, *In the final analysis, it is always just between you and God.*

Quote: "It is tough to see the truth from the insane.
Often, others ridicule what they don't understand.
After all, it is all but a simple dream of mine ... hehehe
"
.........

*Like*

Thats what it is for all of us,

including the insane part.

Thats why it doesnt matter.

You can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are.

~Eckhart Tolle

Quote: "no don. sorry. me and her talked. kiss her goodbye. haha. "
.........

I swear its true, she said to me,

*Dont worry.  I will take care of Shayne.*

Hey, maybe she meant it in a good way,

but we clearly are not getting the same things in our meditations.

You can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are.

~Eckhart Tolle

"
.........

Thats something else the Spirit has said to me,

*I am you, and you are me.  We are One together, forever.*

I know it all comes from within, but then, what doesnt ?

We all possess volumes of our own mythology.

What comes in meditation is from our Self to ourselves. 

I have met many who claim to be Jesus, or the next coming of Christ or Buddha.  They cant all be right, so I will wait to see which one walks on water, if I live that long.

In my own mythology, Im supposed to be the anti-christ.  In visions, Jesus and I have talked about what we will do when he comes back.  Jehovah has told me I decide who of mankind will survive, to go to heaven or hell. 

The crux of the story is that some thousands of years ago, as angels, Jesus and I disagreed on the fate of mankind.  He wanted to save everyone, and I wanted to kill everyone.  He came to Earth to save everyone, but was crucified instead.  I came to kill everyone, but fell in love instead.  The compromise is that those who can get past me will survive and have eternal life.

And I dont believe in that either.  Its a neat story, played out and given to me in visions over the last 40 years.  But I dont need it or want it.  All I care about is the Spirit, whoever or whatever it is that I know as the Spirit.  She is all that matters to me. 

We are doing fine in my meditation, she and I.  What others have in their meditation is an internal matter exclusive to them, and has nothing to do with me.  If they think it does, then they clearly do not understand Oneness.  But what they have may be a stepping stone to that awareness, in the long run.  Who knows ? 

The Alpha and the Omega are One.

As John Wayne said, *Life is tough.  Especially if you are stupid.*

Problem is, misery loves company, and stupid people love to share it, or at least they try to.  That is part of their buddha nature, afterall..

Quote: "hey missy. the trajetcory of this incoming hurricane might take a sharp left into pennsylvania.

all ive got to say to you is KNOCK IT OFF.

if it occurs. i know you are targeting me and mine. we have children. all of us. not just me.

for the children.

i give you no credance power or strength. i know my mind and its essence.

no fear.

none.

come to reason.

knock off your assault on humanity.

how much more blunt do i need to be?

stop.

please.



"
.........

My mom died in a hurricane blizzard in 1993.  On the way to visit her in the hospital, I asked the Spirit what would happen on this visit because Id been up there every weekend for awhile. 

The Spirit said, *She will not be able to withstand the force of the hurricane.  When the eye of it reaches her she will die.*  At that time it was still a tropical storm in Central America, expected to go up into the Gulf of Mexico.  Which it did, then turned into a hurricane, hopped over Florida, and came up the eastern seaboard to where we were in Delaware.  When the eye of it passed over us, mom died, just as the Spirit said.

The eye of a hurricane is only 30 miles wide.  To predict its path from about 1500 miles away is phenominal.  The barometric pressure inside the eye is 15 to 20 % lower than the rest of the hurricane, which is already low.  I believe it was that sudden drop in barometric pressure that killed mom.

I love the Spirit, and I belong to her.  Im glad she is patient with me, and plans to keep me *for an eternity* in the place that she has given me in the Void, to be with her.  I dont question her judgement.  I may not be entirely sure where that *place* is, but I know it exists in creation, and thats where Im going when I die.  As she says, *Its only a heartbeat away.*

"
.........

hmmmm?

life is not preordained.

dont use her.

i know i didnt call this massive storm up thats gonna hit us.

why would i?

"
.........

hmmmm?

life is not preordained.

dont use her.

i know i didnt call this massive storm up thats gonna hit us.

why would i?





"
.........

Quote: "hmmm thinking about.

pressing charges against you bucko.

me and the whole east coast.

haha.


"
.........

Pressing charges against whom ?

You think someone threw a hurricane at you ?

Quote: "me i just want a normal girlfriend.

except for my imagination im pretty rock solid.

maybe you should check yours don.




"
.........

I know youve just been messing with my head about the Spirit, Shayne. 

What Ive been getting from the Spirit has been right in keeping with what Ive been getting the last 40 years. 

Who or what she is, I dont know for sure, that I could swear to anyway.  Imaginary friend, personification of my subconscious mind, spiritual entity, or as she claims, the Spirit, the One, Itself.  Weve been together a long time and our relationship is pretty secure. 

She promises that when I die I will go home to her in our place in the Void and be there together for an eternity.  That is my religious belief, since I have that on faith.  We are all entitled to our own religious beliefs, afterall, arent we ?  Doesnt seem to be hurting anyone, and it does help me, so good enough.

Oddly, in hypnosis, the subconscious will often refer to the conscious in the 3rd person, just as I have often heard actors do with characters they have played.  Seems fitting.  So if I had to explain it to a psychiatrist Im sure we would agree that it is my subconscious playing the part of the Spirit, and the predictions shes made that have come true must be based on subconscious calculation.  Especially since Ive been working with self hypnosis since the 60s and have a lot of experience in that area.

But I understand it is your nature, your buddha nature, to go to a party and slip a turd into the punch bowl just for fun.  Thats who you are, Shayne.  You resent people who seem to have more intelligence than you, but maybe I dont.  After high school I went to trade school for drafting, then racked up 147 semester hours of undergrad college, and a few more courses in an MBA program before my veterans benefits ran out.  Maybe Ive just spent more nights and weekends studying while you sucking down beers and shooting zombies in video games.  Maybe its just the product of honest hard work.

In a dream tonight before work, I split your skull open with a broadsword and it was full of wriggly crawley worms.  Sounds about right.  Dreams are your subconscious mind trying to tell you something.  I think the message was pretty clear about you.  I will go with that, worm head.

Quote: "man you BEST say its imaginary or your subconscious.

your mom died from again?

answer the question.



"
.........

I believe it was a sudden drop in barometric pressure, related to a passing hurricane.

So what ?  Whats your problem ?

That I knew the hurricane was coming is another matter entirely.

Also there were a number of psychic things that went on in her last couple of days that proved to be true, but thats beside the point.

Shut up, Shayne.  Youre a worm head.  And a jerk off.  I dont know if you are stupid or not,

you might have a high IQ for all I know, but you behave stupidly.

Keep your threats to yourself.  Ive been trained too, and could kill you in two seconds flat.

Quote: "done deal.

shut up now.

reflect.

cure yourself.

haha

unto further......antichrists.

they will call me the shayne.

haha.

do it or this goes viral.




"
.........

As a disability rep, I worked thousands of psych cases and, man, you are *touched*.  You are totally bonkers, you freakin worm head, Shayne.  And I didnt say you must have a high IQ, I just havent ruled it out. 

I do believe you have some psychic gifts, but you think youre the big whiz.  Fish blowing bubbles is peanuts, and other than that you seem to be just guessing.  When you guess right you say youre psychic, and when you guess wrong, well then the planets werent aligned right.  like when you guessed I was short and fat.  Im 5*7 and weigh 125 lbs.  But I will give you credit for trying.  I dont try, I just wait to see what comes to me.

Yeah, I have encountered things in meditation about me being the antichrist, but what I think about that, and those who believe themselves to be Christs, or Jesus reincarnated, is that the ego fights for survival that way.  By making you believe you are important, the ego retains a foothold.  The constant struggle in Zen is to reduce the ego by diminishing self importance. 

I believe in the Spirit because she has proven to me many times that she does exist.   But that is my religious belief, and Im entitled to it, or It as the case may be.  I have told her many times that I dont care about this world, or the people in it, just get me home to the Void, thats all I ask of her.

Wish I could say Im sorry about the hurricane.  But Im not.  It just is what it is.  Deal with it, and good luck.

Quote: "Conditions will change again and the calm will return.
The storm hit .. my area was lite ... some heavy rain and strong winds
But, no power outage or heavy damage.
Seems life just continues ....
"
.........

It is impossible not to reply any answers while being at this forum.

Quote: "Conditions will change again and the calm will return.
The storm hit .. my area was lite ... some heavy rain and strong winds
But, no power outage or heavy damage.
Seems life just continues ....
"
.........

Being in a hurricane blizzard in Delaware in 1993 was scary with 100 mph + winds blowing all around, even in a brick house.  I was reminded of the story of the pigs with the wolf huffing and puffing outside the door, and had a feeling I knew what they went through.  I was at my brothers house, in a sleeping bag in front of the fireplace.  The fire was warm and comforting.

Then, being in the eye of the hurricane was something incredibly peaceful.  A unique and wonderful experience, with fresh snow everywhere, and complete stillness, not even birds chirping.  The birds had all evacuated ahead of the storm.  Nothing moving.

We went to the hospital and got moms stuff from her room, as they had called and told us she had died.  Then we went back to my brothers house and rode out the other half of the storm.

Quote: "man i love my life. it is the most awesome thing in the whole universe.

yowser.

i rock.

period.

i love me

period.

but i also love all of humanity.

jedi masters unite.

haha.

come togther. right now.under me.

haha.

we are gonna kick butt.


"
.........

Sorry Shayne, but I dont really believe Im the antichrist,

and you are not Jack Sheite either.

Its just your ego fighting to keep you from awakening.

Even though you had an *epiphany* when you were 13,

your ego, like everyone elses, will fight for its life all of your life.

Im sure you would love to be Maitreya, and I would be a good Antichrist,

but thats not what its really all about.  Even if such things come to pass,

there is no reason to focus or dwell on them until the time comes, is there.

The thing to do is to set aside the egos, and enjoy the lives we have now.

Even if God were to send a Maitreya to humanity, dont you think she would

pick someone with at least half a brain ?!

Oh, wait, I think I get it.

God has had it in for mankind since the crucifixion, for the murder of Jesus

by the Church and the State.  So her *get even* plan is to have Shayne take over

the world as the Buddha Maitreya.

This makes perfect sense, let the world suffer under the appropriations and machinations of a Machiavelian Idiot.

Im glad Im heading back into the Void with the Spirit.  I wouldnt want to be around for that.

Quote: "Machiavelli was an idiot? I didn't know that. "
.........

I thought he was a prince, or maybe its that one of the Medicis was used as a model.

One dafination of idiot is one who acts without regard for his own welfare, or that of others. 

Quote: "It's strange for the strange. Is that your fighting weight?"
.........

Im older, I used to be bigger.  But I am still fast, and thats all I ever really had going for me since it is usually larger guys Ive had to contend with.

Im also disabled, so if i get into a fight I have to go for a quick kill, one, two, or a few seconds max. 

I have focused my previous training, back when I was young, on blocking.  I will not take the first swing.  But once legal justification has been given, I will move quickly to kill without hesitation.  I have been known to do that. 

In the past I have just gotten them in a hold, ready to kill them, and then they surrender.  One guy though, when I threatened to kill him, said *go ahead*.  I didnt.  I just let him go.  Then I turned to his friend, who was blocking the door, and said *Just let me the F out of here*.  He stepped aside and opened the door for me to leave. 

The guy I had pinned up against the wall was 6*5 and was considered to be the toughest guy in town.  He underestimated me.  By the time he knew he was in trouble it was too late, I already had him in a hold ready to kill him.

Sometimes fighting for your life is just that.  I made a joke and found myself trapped in a bars bathroom with two large guys.  One was sitting on the sink with his foot against the door, and the other attacked me.  I remember thinking, *The only way out is through*, and then I got busy.  I almost killed the guy I had up against the wall, but then he slapped his hands down and froze just in time for me to pull back again. 

Adreneline is a wonderful drug. 

Some people think they are tough, but theyve never made a bonofide effort to kill anyone, and no one has ever tried to kill them either.  I have made that *bonofide effort* more than once, but they keep surrendering, or running away.

Quote: "yeah starduster.....i dont care....period.

blocking? your kidding me? blocking?

dude......i do nerve destructions when people attack me. simutaneous defense and attack. you do NOT know how to fight.

haha.

i do attack by combination.....feignting......drawing......

goof.



"
.........

Guys get into a fight thinking they are going to beat someone up and win.  I dont fight to win, just to keep from getting hurt, or killed, or whatever.  Id rather kill someone than get a bloody nose.  Their life has no value to me.

It amazes me that at my age there are guys half my age and twice my size who think they should get in my face.  I get right back in theirs.  They have to make the first move, and preferrably in front of witnesses.  Then, acting in self defense, I can do anything.  And I will.

I was trained by a Marine Gunnery Sgt with a 2nd degree black belt in Tai Kwan Do.  He included hand to hand combat techniques in his training as well.  He was getting us ready to go to Vietnam.  I didnt go into combat, but his training has helped me to survive a number of times.  He said to me once, *Youve got more guts than anyone else here*. 

I will do everything I can to avoid a fight, but if I cant I will kill them as quickly and efficiently as I can.  I made it a point to learn to block well, because I will not take the first swing.