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→→→→ vertical line TOPIC: JUST ME WITH MYSELF
vertical line Posted on Aug.10.2013 @ 10:42PM EDT by *CSEe*

Dear all , after being involved in so many buddhism forum , direct conversation with " Buddhism master" , I realized that there are huge differences between my perception of Buddhism compared to others understanding .

what is Buddhism to you ? Many would refer it to what being teach as Siddharta's words , from scriptures or text ...some even directly follow what Buddhism master said .

To me , whatever path one follows is never right or wrong , no path is true or false as all is part of ownselves learning lesson .

I am awaken to Buddhism concept by my experience since ege ten after suffering from extreame fear of death ........and later at ege 18 of my extraction to a woman , both emotions had lead me realizing Buddhism ......my understanding of Buddhism is not from any teacher or text but is a very simple explaination / concept that had indeed bring peace to me ...I am here to challenge it for better understanding to progress into greater realization .

To my current understanding , all existence regardless living or non-living is originally NOTHING and exist due to polluted energy ............for non-living , that energy is their nature / their material body .......for living such as human , our cause of existence is our will , our emotion that I known it as "MYSELF" ......so Buddhism is a nature process all existence going back into the original condition of nothingness ......Buddhism is the only process that in all living or non-living. Each existence will evolved , changing shapes , rot , decay .......all is in own process into emptiness , to become nothing ......this process is known to me as Buddhism .

So nothing escape Buddhism ........... 

So whatever material out there said to be "teaching" of Siddharta is just a source of information for own learning , is never a referral to Buddhism . Buddhism is all about ownselves ...is a process to discover ownselves by own realization . Nothing will cause our realization except ourselves ...others is only a factor never the cause ......

In all Buddhism forum , many if not all members had created a faith on Buddhism and strictly follow what being said by their teacher or commom "Buddha" teaching ...their cant move away from it and claiming a rights on what Buddhism should be .....whatever I say to them is not Buddhism and must be wrong , this had caused me being banned in more than 8 Buddhism website .

I really hope members here could give me a change to seek for better understanding by debate with me .....you could use your knowledge / your reason to believe / your teacher words etc to debate with me .....and in a debate , is common your give all your understanding / knowledge to state your reason and same goes to me ..........this debate is NOT to determine who win or lost , right or wrong , true or false ...but is a very healthy way to challenge own views for better understanding .

By debating , I will explore deep into my awareness and give my reason for my views ...I will explore in areas that I never been , realizing new awareness , understand more from others reply even my own writing ...in debate I not only learn from others but I also learn from myself , my explaination to others ......so dear all , I spend almost 5 hours a day in internet not only in porn website but also in Buddhism / spiritual website just to discover more on myself ........yet I am a father to a 13 years old daughter , a husband , a son to mother and a financial provider to so many people in my home ......yet I live within Buddhism .

For the last 8 years , every moment in life I realizing Buddhism ...  so please understand my sincerity ..............I just learning here   

Thks

CSEe


Go to Latest Reply   Reply to this Topic   Email *CSEe*
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Reply from leoj99
Aug.11.2013
12:18AM EDT 
vertical line Zen  is the practice of forgetting yourself until you completely forget yourself.
vertical line Quote & Reply   Post Reply 154149
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Reply from cosmicomic
Aug.11.2013
07:35AM EDT 
Email cosmicomic
vertical line The last thing I remember was seeing a fiery angel with flaming wings, dive down from the top of the precipice - a messenger crossing the bridge of separation between heaven and hell. Then I woke up in this room - I have no idea how I got here, or who I am.
vertical line Quote & Reply   Post Reply 154150
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Reply from Avisitor
Aug.11.2013
11:13AM EDT 
Email Avisitor
vertical line "what is Buddhism to you ? Many would refer it to what being teach as Siddharta's words , from scriptures or text ...some even directly follow what Buddhism master said ."

Buddhism is the teachings of Buddha.
It is not the epiphany you had as a ten year old.

"To me , whatever path one follows is never right or wrong , no path is true or false as all is part of ownselves learning lesson ."

If you are on a path of destruction then it is simply the wrong path.
What is so hard to understand?
Why do you keep defending your view of no right or wrong?

"I am awaken to Buddhism concept by my experience since ege ten after suffering from extreame fear of death"

You were not awakened. You had an epiphany. Big difference.

" ........and later at ege 18 of my extraction to a woman"

How exactly did you have an extraction to woman???
Please look up the definition of the word extraction.
To remove. So, at age 18, you were removed from a woman???

", both emotions had lead me realizing Buddhism"

Awakening is not an emotion.
An epiphany is not an emotion.
You are changing the meanings of words to suit your own needs and this messes up communication.

"......my understanding of Buddhism is not from any teacher or text but is a very simple explaination / concept that had indeed bring peace to me ...I am here to challenge it for better understanding to progress into greater realization."

If your understanding didn't come from any teacher or any books on Buddhism or words from the Buddha then it is not Buddhism.
Maybe this is why when you insist on your version of Buddhism that you were banned from other forums. Understand yet??


"To my current understanding , all existence regardless living or non-living is originally NOTHING and exist due to polluted energy ............for non-living , that energy is their nature / their material body .......for living such as human , our cause of existence is our will , our emotion that I known it as "MYSELF" ......so Buddhism is a nature process all existence going back into the original condition of nothingness ......Buddhism is the only process that in all living or non-living. Each existence will evolved , changing shapes , rot , decay .......all is in own process into emptiness , to become nothing ......this process is known to me as Buddhism .

So nothing escape Buddhism ........... "

Again, that is not Buddhism but you version of what you think is Buddhism.
It is just your own philosophy!!! Not Buddhism.

"So whatever material out there said to be "teaching" of Siddharta is just a source of information for own learning , is never a referral to Buddhism . Buddhism is all about ownselves ...is a process to discover ownselves by own realization . Nothing will cause our realization except ourselves ...others is only a factor never the cause ......"

The sunflower seed will grow sunflowers and not Buddhism.
Buddhas teachings will grow Buddhism and not sunflowers.
The tomato seed will grow tomatoes and not Buddhism.


"In all Buddhism forum , many if not all members had created a faith on Buddhism and strictly follow what being said by their teacher or commom "Buddha" teaching ...their cant move away from it and claiming a rights on what Buddhism should be .....whatever I say to them is not Buddhism and must be wrong , this had caused me being banned in more than 8 Buddhism website ."

Can you take a hint??

"I really hope members here could give me a change to seek for better understanding by debate with me .....you could use your knowledge / your reason to believe / your teacher words etc to debate with me .....and in a debate , is common your give all your understanding / knowledge to state your reason and same goes to me ..........this debate is NOT to determine who win or lost , right or wrong , true or false ...but is a very healthy way to challenge own views for better understanding .

By debating , I will explore deep into my awareness and give my reason for my views ...I will explore in areas that I never been , realizing new awareness , understand more from others reply even my own writing ...in debate I not only learn from others but I also learn from myself , my explaination to others ......so dear all , I spend almost 5 hours a day in internet not only in porn website but also in Buddhism / spiritual website just to discover more on myself ........yet I am a father to a 13 years old daughter , a husband , a son to mother and a financial provider to so many people in my home ......yet I live within Buddhism .

For the last 8 years , every moment in life I realizing Buddhism ... so please understand my sincerity ..............I just learning here

Thks

CSEe"

No, no debate. You are simply wrong in your understanding of Buddhism.
And you insist on defending you version as the one and true version of Buddhism.

Alan, it is okay if you want to ban me for talking this way to CSEe.
It just seems impossible to get through to him. Sorry.
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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
03:01PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Dear Avisitor , you said , I quote "Buddhism is the teachings of Buddha." Un-quote

YES , if only you based on your knowledge . In knowledge ofcause Buddhism is a teaching by a prince call Siddharta , he also known as Buddha ......but dear Avisitor , from my realization from his words " awake & emptiness" ...........by being awake , you will realize YOU and YOURSELF ...you will realized what is emotions , what is knowledge , what is culture etc ........so if you not awaken to this ......you will stick to knowledge , believe solely of your knowledge , you will create a faith on who are you , you will became the knowledge itself .....so Avisitor is someone you know and will become someone you wish to know ........

you will always be the one you already known .......so if you always know perhaps you are just being yourself , entertaining your desire , your emotion and you will always find joy and suffering based on your knowledge ..............perhaps if you really realize Mr Siddharta realization , you will discover that all this time you are playing in your own games ......you are always washing your clothes in muddy water .......you will realize WHAT are you , NOT who are you ......perhaps you will realize the original nature of YOU-the nothingness and the cause of your existence - YOURSELF .

So perhaps you will understand that Buddhism is NEVER related toSiddharta at all ...is not something created by him , he just explain it to human . Buddhism or you can call it in any names is only happening to all existence and you will realize it .......in your own journey ........

I am ready to debate with you further if you interested .


You said , I quote "If you are on a path of destruction then it is simply the wrong path.
What is so hard to understand?
Why do you keep defending your view of no right or wrong?" Un-quote

In knowledge , if I see a monk carry a Siddharta statues on his head all his life perhaps I laught at him ...........thats human culture which knowledge is used as basis ...BUT my current understanding of Buddhism, he is providing a great learning source for me , so if I cant find reason to agree with him this is because perhaps I haven reach that level of understanding yet or perhaps I will never have any reason to agree with him ......he regardless what his action is never right or wrong as he is in his own learning lesson to discover his emotion .......

Dear Sir , you seems attached greatly in human culture perhaps you will realize that Buddhism is beyond human culture ...so if you always look down how could you see the bird flying above you ?.....Sorry is not normal for me to comment others path

You said , I quote "How exactly did you have an extraction to woman???
Please look up the definition of the word extraction.
To remove. So, at age 18, you were removed from a woman???Un-quote

Frankly I am not quite sure what is your meaning here ..

You said " Awakening is not an emotion.
An epiphany is not an emotion.
You are changing the meanings of words to suit your own needs and this messes up communication." Un-quote

Yes agreed ......that is never an emotion IF you free yourself from knowledge .........

Dear Sir , please stop acuse me , I am not a politican okey ...........you are always welcome to ask me to explain if you need my explaination



You said " If your understanding didn't come from any teacher or any books on Buddhism or words from the Buddha then it is not Buddhism.
Maybe this is why when you insist on your version of Buddhism that you were banned from other forums. Understand yet??"Again, that is not Buddhism but you version of what you think is Buddhism.
It is just your own philosophy!!! Not Buddhism.

 Un-quote

Thats human culture my friend ...if Bill Gates wear a 10 Dollars watch , people will say worth millions ...if a homeless wear a 1000 Dollars watch , people will say is a rubbish ...if I am a monk , or if I knows all the terminology of Buddhism in our conversation perhaps many will respect me ........

Why dont you use your knowledge of Buddhism and debate with me and see what happens ......if you never debate how you know my understanding is not Buddhism ?


You said , I quote"The sunflower seed will grow sunflowers and not Buddhism.
Buddhas teachings will grow Buddhism and not sunflowers.
The tomato seed will grow tomatoes and not Buddhism." Un-quote

The sunflower  exist because of the will to exist , and the seed will grow as the seed NOT the flower and will end as the seed , the tree will grow and end as the tree , the flower will grow and end as flower ......all this process of exist , life , death , decay , rotting is NATURAL process to becoming emptiness back into nothingness ....all thing will change form , will rust , will rot , will decay ...into emptiness ....THATS BUDDHISM ....

All happening regardless any action from living or the nature of non-living is BUDDHISM TEACHING ...........Osama action is Buddhism teaching , Dalai Lama words is Buddhism teaching , the stray dog in the street is Buddhism teaching , watching two lover making love is Buddhism teaching ....understanding the nature of a pen on your table is Buddhism teaching ........understanding the nature of rubbish inside or outside your house is Buddhism teaching ......is always you , your will , your choice in your world .

Again if you based on your knowledge as basis .........you will know what you already known or what you wish to know ..............


You said , I quote "No, no debate. You are simply wrong in your understanding of Buddhism.And you insist on defending you version as the one and true version of Buddhism.Alan, it is okay if you want to ban me for talking this way to CSEe.
It just seems impossible to get through to him. Sorry."Un-quote

"Un-quote

Dear Avisitor , I am sorry I laugh reading these ...I always being asked to be banned but this is the first time , others ask moderator to ban themselves .......

Dear Avisitor , in human culture , you used knowledge as a guide so there is good verses bad , right verses wrong , true verses false .....so if you SOLELY use your knowledge as a referral , YES even I do not wish to debate wish you , is just like talking to the wall .....I just hope you can use your knowledge , plus your realization , plus your understanding , plus your experiences perhaps from your meditation to debate with me ............

Dear Avisitor , sorry in advance if you do not have any intention to make me agree with you why is that so hard to debate ? For your record ...I always "winning" in debate because my intention / realization is learning NEVER teaching , so whatever you say is a great lesson for me to learn so how could that be losing ?????

Thks CSEe
.........

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Reply from Avisitor
Aug.11.2013
04:56PM EDT 
Email Avisitor
vertical line Hahahaha .... you never lose cause you are so thick.
You keep your version of your Buddhism based upon two words from the Buddha.
Awaken and emptiness ... hahahaha
What a fool believes, a mad man holds onto with dear life.
If there is no right or wrong then there is no need to debate.
If my knowledge of Buddhism is faulted because it comes from Siddartha then how can there be no right or wrong??
Hahahaha, you have twisted everything to make yourself right.
I am not here to confirm your version of Buddhism.
I have tried like many of the others to tell you there is a right way and a wrong way.
But, you have clogged your ears with your non sense.
Please leave this forum!!
There is no need to misguide others from the real Buddhism.

Alan ... if there is no right or wrong then why were so many banned from here ... hahahahaha.
I'm sorry but this is all I can take from a fool like this!!!
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Reply from leoj99
Aug.11.2013
09:10PM EDT 
vertical line Wondering if  you are gladiators or boxers with big egos...LOL
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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
10:09PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Dear Avisitor , you said , I quote "Hahahaha .... you never lose cause you are so thick." Un-quote

Sorry , I cant find any reason to agree with you ........perhaps if you enter a room full of chef ......and you just observe them , listen to their conversation , look at their action ......and just learn from them from them all , how could you be losing ? You will be much better cook the longer you stay there.............so is always my realization that Buddhism is all about learning from others and ownselves ...never will have any reason to teach others .......my realization of Buddhism is as I progress into my life , my emotion / my attachment of my desire / fear / greed / love etc will be reduced NOT to further increased it ......as my emotion reduced , i will be in a condition of "less self" , experiencing less burden .............so how could I be "thick" my friend .....? 

You said "You keep your version of your Buddhism based upon two words from the Buddha.Awaken and emptiness ... What a fool believes, a mad man holds onto with dear life. " Un-quote

YES .........my awareness of these Siddharta's two words indeed lead me to realization of myself and me . Perhaps I am fool , perhaps is human culture makes me known as a fool , perhaps I am mad , perhaps is human culture defining me as a fool mad man ...well that is human culture .........if you awaken based on Siddharta's words you will realize your attachment / commitment on your knowledge.............and what is beliefs.......and perhaps you will realize your desire / your emotion to hold on to your knowledge / defending your culture ...............

You said , I quote "If there is no right or wrong then there is no need to debate.
hahahaha." Un-quote

No . If there is right and wrong in Buddhism , we do not need to debate as we can let court to decide ........Buddhism is not a religion like Islam or Christain .......in a religion concept , no room to debate......because is a final defination ......so if you choose to belief , you HAVE to have faith of it ..........

More to follow .

Thks

CSEe
.........

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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
10:30PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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You said , I quote " If my knowledge of Buddhism is faulted because it comes from Siddartha then how can there be no right or wrong??Un-quote

Perhaps that is your realization NOT me , I never say your knowledge is wrong . Perhaps if you try to read my posting , I had explained in so-so-so-so many times Siddharta's words is a great source of learning , same and equal as others living or non-living .......perhaps you are confused of your own knowledge and your imagination of me ...........


You said , I quote "Hahahaha, you have twisted everything to make yourself right.
I am not here to confirm your version of Buddhism." Un-quote

If you do not understand my writing or explaination you could always ask me to explain further ...I am more than happy to explain to you but please do not finding reason to mis-quoted me .

I have make it very-very-very clear to all that I never have any intention to influence , or to seek agreement or to defend my views here .........I am here to learn , please try to understand , I had explains perhaps hundreds of time .........

You said " I have tried like many of the others to tell you there is a right way and a wrong way.But, you have clogged your ears with your non sense." Un-quote

Please debate with me .........I can explain to you but apparently if you refuse to listen or investigate ...I think is a waste of time for me to write ..... again , RIGHT VERSES WRONG only in human knowledge , in human culture .......NEVER in Buddhism concept .

Remember you said to me if my wife being rape , I will accept right and wrong and I did explain to you clearly , there is no right or wrong in Buddhism ...........but you never reply me ..................why ?  

You said "Please leave this forum!! Un-quote

Sorryu if I make you angry ...is never my intention .

You said , I quote " There is no need to misguide others from the real Buddhism." Un-quote

I have no such intention or awareness of it ..........................


More to follow .

Thks

CSEe.........

.........
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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
10:48PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Dear Avisitor , you said I quote "Alan ... if there is no right or wrong then why were so many banned from here ... hahahahaha.
I'm sorry but this is all I can take from a fool like this!!!
"" Un-quote

Human had created a system of living in a group ...this system is call culture . In this culture human created knowledge that defining right against wrong , true verses false , good verses bad .....from lifelihood / life experiences / commom sense .........from human culture , we now created a civil law that clearly define right verses wrong ...............so to me , if I use the common words as I learn in porn wedsite here or rude to others ...in human culture I am wrong and should be banned .

But ......................this website is about Buddhism , exploring Buddhism , discussion of Buddhism .....dear Avisitor , have you realize my writing here ????? 

I am more than interested to explain my understanding of Buddhism to you and hoping you could challenge it ...........but if only you interested .

Thks

CSEe

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Reply from the alan
Aug.11.2013
10:55PM EDT 
Email the alan
vertical line Quote: "

Alan, it is okay if you want to ban me for talking this way to CSEe.
It just seems impossible to get through to him. Sorry.
"
.........

Sometimes it's wise to simply step away and out of the conversation. Now is that time.

I don't ban people for voicing themselves no matter how (mis)guided, right, wrong, etc. as perceived by others. I ban them for not following the simple posting guidelines.
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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
11:00PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Quote: "Quote: "

Alan, it is okay if you want to ban me for talking this way to CSEe.
It just seems impossible to get through to him. Sorry.
"
.........

Sometimes it's wise to simply step away and out of the conversation. Now is that time.

I don't ban people for voicing themselves no matter how (mis)guided, right, wrong, etc. as perceived by others. I ban them for not following the simple posting guidelines.
"
.........

Thanks ...........this is the only Buddhism website I found freedom to express my views .......

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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.11.2013
11:20PM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Dear Avisitor , I think both of us are in great condition for a debate ...perhaps we even have started a debate here .............you are very welcome to debate with me in here or via my private email : fomains@gmail.com .....................I am just hoping you learn from you as I notice we have a huge diffences in understanding of Buddhism , I really prefer a dis-agreement as we could learn more .

Thks

CSEe

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Reply from leoj99
Aug.12.2013
01:53AM EDT 
vertical line So what if you won the debate...LOL
In this kind of debates no one wins. It will only go forever...LOL
And you feel hungry and thirsty after every debate...if not headaches... headaches for nothing..LOL

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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.12.2013
04:11AM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Perhaps let me explain my realization of "right" and "wrong" in Buddhism concept .

What is right and wrong ?

As human we know / accept right or wrong based on our knowledge ....and our current social system have Civil Law to define right and wrong ....no question on that .

But if we awaken into greater realization , we will realize all that we know , is something taught / told to us , is from our education , information from our parent , what we learn from our sociaty / our local culture , from our family/relative / friends etc ......all these is something we attached into and accepted it as basis of our lifelihood .....

so.......lets me explain .

If a killer kill someone for money , in our current social system he should be isolated / purnished because we had created a system for living together and in this system we have a civil law .....this civil law define such action is wrong and the killer should be purnished ......YES as human , I agree ....we need such system to have a control.............but Buddhism is beyond all this culture , beyond all knowledge , Buddhism is not something we already know or something we wish to know ..........Buddhism is as what Siddharta's descripe ' AWAKE"..........

If we awake , we not asleep , we will aware thing as it is , we will never put color to thing that we see , never inject emotion into thing that we observed ........we just see thing as it is ........

We will realize what we are , not who we are , we will realize we are same and equal with anything or anyone .....we will realize nothing belong to us even our body is not owned by us ...we will realize no special love for special people , no special emotion for special thing ..........we will realize we are our emotion , we are our feeling , we are our fear , our love , our desire ......not the body that our parent told us is ours .........

as we progress , we will realize we are always alone in our journey of our choice , our will in our world .........we will realize the cause of our existence , the nature of our existence and the end of us ........we will realize that all this time we are dreaming in the movie directed by us .........

as we progress into this realization ,we will realize that our emotions is causing our existence , joy , sorrow , suffering is re-action of mind , mind is reflection of collective emotions ......we will realize we are always in a natural process de-attaching ourselves from our original condition ........we will realize we are in a natural process realizing / accepting / freeing our emotion , liberation from our attachment on emotion ...freeing ourselves from us ........

As we accepted this natural process , we will realize that all action by ownselves or others is a great source for us to discover  our emotion .......therefore we will realize what is knowledge , we will realize our attachment on knowledge , we will see knowledge as it is ...just an information .........and we will understand "right" and "wrong" is ONLY LIMITED in knowledge..............

In Buddhism , the killer regardless he aware during his action killing others for money or not , is in his own process to discover himself ...he need to learn , he need to realize his emotion because that is his natural process ....same as Dalai Lama ...... his action is also provide a great learning lesson to others including the victim family ....his action will provide a lesson for the victim family to discover their emotion of love , greed , ego etc towards the victim or the anger / hate etc towards the killer ........

As for the victim , he dead not cause by the killer action as death is part of his body natural process ......his body is never belong to the victim and the body will rot as part of it own Buddhism towards emptiness ...the victim will go on his journey as long as he still attached to its polluted energy of will / desire to exist .........

therefore in my current understanding of Buddhism , is beyond Right" or "wrong" ...Buddhism is no right or wrong .........................

Is easy to understanding Buddhism concept , but for me in current condition full of polluted energy ...is seems too hard for me to accept it .......I am ready to debate with anyone for greater understanding .

Thks

CSEe

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Reply from *CSEe*
Aug.12.2013
09:00AM EDT 
Email *CSEe*
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Dear Avisitor you said"How exactly did you have an extraction to woman???
Please look up the definition of the word extraction." Un-quote.

Sorry my dear friend .....wrong spelling , is attraction not extraction ............thnks for pointing out ..............

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