When a monk came to say good bye to Chao-chou Tsung-shen (778-897), a brilliant Chinese Ch'an master.
-Where will you go?
The monk answered:
-Any place where I can learn Buddha dharma.
I need some stuff, naturally, since I live in this body for the moment. But I'm not sure how to get it sometimes and I'm not sure if I'm ready or willing. Maybe I have excuses or fears or whatever. It's just a matter of time which leads to waiting which is the realm of desire. And there is going without, and there is going within which is no help. And then I'm left with no plans or no thoughts to which avail I'm so easy going that I am going nowhere. Then arrive at the end of the day and try to revise it to how I wished it was. That turns out to be no help. Then by now I've spent half the night awake so I say a prayer which is useless because nobody has a prayer therefore it's just a means to fall asleep. Finally a new day comes around but I have no purpose but to eat and sleep just to continue my life...that's that.